Every day when we wake up, we are presented with a choice: either to lead the life in the same old fashioned way with same old habits or to get up, rise up and bring change in our way of living.
Be born again, By choosing gratitude over attitude By thinking positive over negative By being optimistic over pessimistic By picking happiness over sadness By spreading love over hate. Be born again, To rise and shine again To grow and learn again To love and forgive again To heal and prosper again To be whole and complete again.
We all have heard the word gratitude many times; a word so simple has the power to change our life for good, if we are seriously looking to change our life. Gratitude is an attitude of appreciation for all the small and big things in our life.
“Thank you”, is a magical word given to us to unlock the happiness in our life. The key is in our hand, so the decision rest upon us either to open the lock or let it remained close.
I learned this magic of gratitude working through my little sister, who always expressed her gratitude for every small things and therefore she is happy unlike me.I never knew that she has been practicing gratitude so effectively, till I noticed it.For example, “Thank you for making coffee for me”. Though this sentence looks simpler, but that’s the process of gratitude, expressing thank you by specifying reason for what you are being grateful for.
In almost all the culture, people have been practicing gratitude since the beginning of time in the form of prayer, as a gesture to acknowledge help given by someone, etc.But since we have become so busy in our life that somehow we forgot the real essence of gratitude.
It is very similar to Newton’s third law of motion, “To every action, there is equal and opposite reaction”. So, when we start expressing gratitude to people and things around us, we start changing our life, by attracting more prosperity. For example, if you say thank you to the money, while you give it other, you thereby attract more money in your life. Similarly, if we say thank you to our body for our health, we attract more health. What we give out, we receive.
Another important point about gratitude is it not only helps in attracting what you want in life, but it also helps you in lifting your mood. Let’s say, if you have a bad mood, you can instantly change your mood by thinking three things you are grateful for. There are many simple ways in which one can include gratitude in their life and see its magic happening.
- Starting your morning with gratitude. When you are in the bed, start your day by expressing “Thank you Universe for….”.
- Think of five things in the morning for being thankful for.
- Try saying the magical word as much time as you want for the entire day, including food, water, clothes, job, and children, etc.
- Whenever you feel low, change its frequency (of mood) by thinking of three things you are grateful for.
- End your day with gratitude.
Please remember we are bestowed with many blessings, big or small from universe. Expressing gratitude not only helps in keeping the things you have, it also attracts more abundance as well as happiness. Let the magic of gratitude begin.
Anger, referred as a negative emotion, the more we try to resist, the more strength it gains. The strength of anger is often so strong that it controls us during a heat of the moment.
I tried fighting my anger again and again. The more I tried to fight it, the more intense it became. With each passing day, this fight to win over anger became difficult for me.
I was always told that anger is very bad, we should not get angry. Those who get angry are not good. So, whenever it knocked in the door of my mind, I shut the door more tightly. I started suppressing it, assuming that it will go away eventually. But it didn’t happen. I kept the anger bottled up inside me, consuming me from inside and out. Slowly, I felt like trapped in a spider’s web, unable to escape.
One fine day I realized, do I really need to suppress my anger? I have already tried that for years, but it didn’t help. So, one day when anger knocked on my mind’s door again, I opened the door. But this time I was loving and kind towards it and hence we connected. For the first time,I embraced my anger part and I realized that it wanted to tell me so many things.
I started peeling its layers and then I found fear which was hidden deep inside me as I never wanted it to be revealed to the world.Secondly,I discovered rejection; from jobs, friends, relationships, work, etc. as nobody likes facing rejection. I peeled further layers and uncovered pain and hurt from others as well as by myself.Next,I observed diseases that was created unknowingly by me (psycho-somatic diseases) by suppressing anger. One last layer was peeled by me, and tears started rolling my eyes when I realized the amount of self-hatred I have within me.
This was the day when I uncovered a very important secret to emotions, i.e., every emotion we feel has something to tell us, a message which it wants to give, it is upon us whether we want to listen or ignore it.
We must understand that emotions, whether it is positive or negative are both part of our self. We cannot separate one part completely, although we do need to understand what message does it wants to convey. Listen to the message, when your anger, anxiety, sadness, fear etc. knocks on your door. Remember, these emotions are just the tip of an ice berg.Address those emotions and then let it go.
There are certain things which we can do in order to deal with our anger, such as:
- Create a journal, write it down(applicable to most of the emotions including anger)
- Take a face mirror, look into your eyes and speak to it, release all the resistance.
- Talk to someone you trust or someone who listens to you unconditionally.
- Write a letter to the person (to whom anger is directed), write everything down; tear it and either burn or flush it (try this out!)
- If it still doesn’t work, be mindful and whenever a negative thought enters, consciously think of 3 positive things, try to flip the script each time with positivity.
Let us all remember that every emotion is a way of expression of our hidden feelings. Embrace your emotions instead of fighting it, give it love and acceptance, it will go away.
Journey of Self-Love
In our day to day life, we often speak about “self-love”, how we should love ourselves, how we should give time to self, how we should make ourselves a priority. But do we really love ourselves?
Often we assume that we can easily develop self-love, in a day or two. Let’s say by taking a break, travelling, going for shopping, joining a hobby class, pampering ourselves with a movie, by doing exercise and the list goes on and on.
But have we ever thought that why a rise in mental health issues is there? Do we ever wonder why do we easily get angry? Why do we feel stressed most of the time? Why do we feel sad? What has led to an increase in suicide rate? What are our greatest fears and insecurities? Why am I always anxious? What are we afraid of?
Now the real question is what has led to so many problems in our life?
To answer this, let’s visualize a one year old child. They love each and every part of their body. They are filled with unconditional love; their smile reflects the love stored in their heart and their eyes reflect joy and happiness. But as they grow up(just like we did); their parents starting teaching them the concept of right and wrong, based on their experience and learning from their parent. And thus a vicious cycle of right & wrong, conditional love gets transferred from one generation to another. While as an adult, we start teaching the concept of right and wrong (based on our own little experience), the child gradually starts developing the idea that only if they do everything right, then his parents would love and accept him (conditional love).So the child starts a war within himself and starts feeling, “I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH”, “I AM STUPID”,”I CAN’T DO ANYTHING”,etc. Slowly as the child grows up, love for self becomes conditional and he starts loosing love and acceptance for itself. So when we grow up as an adult, we start abusing ourselves for every little mistake, developing a parameter of judging ourselves and thus become the biggest critic of self.
While speaking of self-love, Pt. Shri Ram Sharma Acharya has stated,”Realize your worth and believe that you are uniquely made by the almighty in the world.”
Now that you have understood that self-love is a long journey,which requires feeding yourself with positive thoughts,unconditional love and self acceptance,I would like to ask you :
ARE YOU READY TO BEGIN YOUR JOURNEY OF SELF-LOVE?
If yes, then right now go towards the mirror and look deep into your eyes and say, “I love you, I really really love you. I accept you exactly as you are.”(Louise Hay’s affirmation)
How do you feel?Now I would request you to do this as many times as you can,daily.
Congratulations! Your journey of self-love has begun.
I stop criticizing myself
I stop neglecting myself
I stop punishing myself
I stop feeling guilty
I stop feeling angry
I stop carrying resentment
I start loving myself
I start caring myself
I start accepting myself
I start trusting myself
I start praising myself
I start forgiving myself
I start transforming myself